Lessons From The Sea

For every step I take in familiarity, the next is in the unknown. With logic in one hand and intuition in the other, the path I must take will guide me through all I must learn. 

The sun was already high as I walked down the beach of Waimea Bay. The warm sand embraced the feet that have carried me my whole life. My heart was beating fast, but the board beneath my arm felt like a shield. I sat at the shoreline looking at the waves. Another winter season was here. In and out I directed my breath. Each time before I paddle out, I try to become so still that all I can hear is the beat of my own heart. Then I know I am ready. I have taken these steps many times before, but this time changed how I will walk the next.  

The paddle out is my refuge of calm before the battle begins. The deep water channel guided me to the waves, and as I got closer I could feel my heart again. This time not in stillness. As I entered the lineup of Waimea, I heard one of the surfers say “this is where we can all be our real selves.” He then proceeded to catch the set of the day. The energy so raw, to be anything else would be futile. That session was just what I needed. A welcome back to the big wave season and a reminder of a conversation that helped set me free. 

A few seasons ago, a big swell hit the outer reefs and lit up the deep water. I wasn’t feeling like I normally did before a big wave session. I couldn’t control the rhythm of my heart or my breath. The nerves consumed me and almost talked me out of the session. I sat in my car trying to calm down. As I was about to drive away I saw a familiar face. 

He approached me calmly and asked if I was going out. I was honest with him. The intensity of emotions I was feeling were released as soon as he said these words. “You just have to find your own line.” To this day, this is still some of the best advice I have ever received. 

I was reminded of his words this last session at Waimea. I heard the truth echoing all around me. Moments of anxiety were replaced with peace. I knew I was in the right spot. Everything I have ever done in my life has prepared me for that moment. Each wave became an opportunity to dive deeper into trust. When I surf, it is a moving prayer. I seek guidance to trust in myself and the source of my abilities. With a combination of free will and predetermined destiny, the present moment is your endless opportunity. Surfing is my opportunity to learn that balance.

As I caught my last wave in, I felt like I was breaking through the barriers of my mind. It set me free into the realization of the truth I couldn’t see. I must be completely and undeniably me. The wave brought me close to shore where I began that journey. I made it to the beach walking a little differently than the beginning of that day. I found my line.